SHAKING THE TREE ... #21

What's Holding You Back?
Unmasking the Barriers to Achieving Your Potential

Do you have dreams?

Things you want to do but simply never got around to focusing on?

Of course you do.

We all do.

I know I do.

Take this newsletter as an example: it's been those things I'd wanted to turn into a reality for four years—something I’d yearned to create but that I’d put off taking action on again and again. Until one day towards the end of April, it seemed like the right thing to do—it seemed like the right thing to focus on.

Yes, things got off to a bumpy start. I've made mistakes and subscribers aren't rolling in as I thought they might. But the newsletter itself is up and running. And with a little planning and a lot of intention, it’s now become a habit: something I will do (not must do, because must dos turn into chores that we wind up resenting) every week.

The only thing holding me back was my lack of action, so the only thing to do was to take action. Easier said than done I know, but still. Here we are.

Whether it's for reasons of personal growth, professional success, or simply finding happiness, I’m certain there's a part of you that craves some sort of progress and fulfillment.

However—and sometimes, often through no fault of our own and despite our best intentions—we find ourselves stuck, we find ourselves unable to plan our next move and unable to move forward quite as we'd like to.

Sometimes it’s because other priorities and responsibilities mean we have to put things off until tomorrow, or until next week or next month or next year.

Eventually though, next week or next year becomes never and as life moves on, our goal ... whatever that is ... seems to get left farther and farther behind.

So below, I want to explore a few tough questions designed to help you identify and overcome the barriers that may be holding you back from achieving whatever may be holding you back, whether that's a case of reaching your true potential or simply getting something done.

Fear of failure:

One of the most common obstacles we face is the fear of failure.

We hesitate to make things happen and to take risks because we worry we'll screw up, and because we fret about the consequences and potential disappointment if things don't work out as we'd hoped they would. One thing's for certain, when we do nothing, nothing happens. To create change we need to make change.

So what if failure wasn't something to worry about or to be feared? What if failure was more of an opportunity designed to help us learn from our shortcomings and created to help us grow as people? With that mindset, what if we were to ask ourselves: "What's the worst thing that can happen if I give this thing a go and I come up short? And what am I missing out on by not even trying?"

By adopting an abundance mindset and by embracing failure as a stepping stone toward success rather than seeing it as something to be avoided, we become better at allowing ourselves to take calculated risks.

Self-doubt and limiting beliefs:

Another powerful force that holds us back is our own self-doubt.

This has been a big thing for me because I've wasted years underestimating my abilities by creating a complex set of self-sabotaging and limiting beliefs that have hindered my progress. Here's the thing: when we have to get better at challenging our beliefs and we have to get better at questioning their validity. We need to ask ourselves: "What evidence do I have to support the limiting beliefs I have about my abilities? What evidence contradicts them?"

Rather than talking yourself down it’s better to recognize your strengths, to celebrate your achievements, and to believe in your capacity to accomplish great things.

Procrastination and lack of discipline:

Procrastination is a deadly, silent, relentless killer of dreams.

We often put off difficult or challenging tasks and we regularly delay taking actions that will serve us well in the long run, not because we are lazy but simply because we don’t make things a priority.

We convince ourselves that we'll do whatever we’re putting off later. We delay and dodge with excuses. We put things off by filling the time with other tasks and activities. But over time, this “I’ll do it later” mentalist turns hours into days, and days into weeks, and weeks into months, and before we know it, time has slipped away and something that might only have taken a few minutes to do winds up taking us forever.

From time to time I think it’s worth our while to take a moment to reflect on our daily habits and routines and to ask ourselves: "Am I prioritizing my tasks, chores, projects, and goals effectively? Am I managing my time efficiently? What steps can I take to cultivate discipline and overcome procrastination?"

By challenging ourselves to get off social media or to make that phone call or to arrange for that repair, we take action that makes progress. If something’s a major issue with several steps, the best way to make things happen is to break that task into smaller, manageable steps, to set clear deadlines, and to hold yourself accountable and responsible for the outcome. You could even make a game out of it, with a reward at the end for having taken action.

Negative influences and toxic relationships:

We all have people in our lives who are happy to bitch, moan, and whine about anything and everything. I call these people BMW drivers (Bitch, Moan, Whine).  

The people we surround ourselves with play a significant role in our journey toward success. Negative influences and toxic relationships can drain our energy and undermine our confidence. Evaluate the people in your life and their impact on your growth.

Ask yourself: "Who are my biggest cheerleaders? Who supports and encourages me? Who drags me down or undermines my efforts?"

Surround yourself with positive, uplifting individuals who believe in your potential and distance yourself from those who bring negativity.

Lack of clarity and vision:

Without a clear vision, it's challenging to move forward with purpose and determination. Take the time to define your goals and visualize the life you desire.

Ask yourself: "What do I truly want to achieve in the next 90 days, or within the next year? What steps can I take to get there? What does success look like to me?"

Create a vision board, write down the things you want to get done and look at that list every day. Set specific goals—actionable, attainable goals—and then develop an action plan you can follow to guide you toward your desired outcomes.

Identifying and addressing the barriers that hold you back is a vital step toward realizing your true potential.

By confronting your fears, challenging your beliefs, and cultivating discipline, by surrounding yourself with positive influences, and gaining clarity on your goals, you’ll find it easier to break free from the shackles that hinder your progress.

Remember, the power to change lies within you. Embrace these tough questions and embark on a journey of personal transformation.

Today is the day to reclaim what is rightfully yours – a life filled with purpose, joy, and achievement.

As always, thanks for reading.

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P.S. Next time on Shaking the Tree …
What Got You Here Won't Get You There: 7 Tips to Cultivate a Positive Mindset