SHAKING THE TREE ... #3

It's time to beat imposter syndrome

Hey there … thanks for stopping. Here’s Shaking the Tree #3 in which I examine imposter syndrome …

TABLE OF CONTENTS:

1. Why you need to follow this guy …

2. Thoughts on overcoming imposter syndrome.

Someone to follow on Twitter right now.

Would you quit a lucrative career to pursue your dream? Kieran Drew did when he quit dentistry to become a writer.

With 7,900+ followers on LinkedIn and 19,000+ newsletter subscribers, Kieran’s on a mission to share share what he learns as he builds his creator business.

To stay up to date on Kieren’s latest projects, follow him on Twitter.

Kieran’s success strikes me as an interesting lead in to this edition’s theme.

ARTICLE:

Overcoming imposter syndrome

Continuing the theme from Kieran Drew’s example above, it’s time we all stopped letting self-doubt can kill our dreams and derail our goals.

Imposter syndrome—is one extreme of something called a cognitive distortion that fuels the feeling that you’re not good enough, that you’re a fraud who is about to be exposed as a phony. It brings with it feelings of inadequacy despite having achieved success or competence in a particular area. This might sound bonkers but it affects more people than you might expect.

At the other end of the cognitive distortion is something called the Dunning-Kruger effect, which is the tendency for individuals with low or no ability in a particular area to overestimate their competence. They are unaware of their lack of skill and knowledge and may even think they are experts when they’re not.

While imposter syndrome affects high achievers, the Dunning-Kruger effect affects those with low ability and is characterized by arrogance, egotism, or even narcissism!

Both can lead to negative consequences such as decreased self-esteem and poor decision-making.

An appropriate and realistic self-appreciation of one’s talents and abilities lies somewhere in the middle. This involves acknowledging one's contributions and competencies, and recognizing one’s weaknesses and failures as opportunities for personal growth.

Contrary to what some with impostor syndrome believe, moving towards the middle does not mean you become an unbearable asshat. However, it does take effort and energy to move toward the middle, and it's important to be mindful of impostor tendencies.

According to a June, 2021 article from the American Psychological Association, a whooping 82% of people struggle with feelings that they’re a fraud and that they haven’t earned what they’ve achieved. SOURCE

82%!

Been there. Done that. And frankly, I’m DONE with it. I’ll spare you the details and simply say it’s been “interesting”.

If imposter syndrome is holding you back, if you feel you’re not up to par, that you have no clue what you’re doing, you’re NOT ALONE.

In my case, I’ve made a lot of progress by reframing my thinking. Although I’m not ‘cured’ so to speak, I’ve certainly improved. Here’s what’s worked for me.

• When someone asks what I can do for them, instead of humming and haring and doubting myself, I’m getting better at telling whoever I’m speaking with what I've done for other people.

• Here’s why this helps: by showing how I've helped other people I boost my own self-esteem while increasing my reputation, and all without bragging. HA! Take that, ego!

• I’ve also found it's important to prove the value of my experience and the results I offer. Over a decade’s worth of contributions to an online forum helps with that.

• It’s taken me a long time to wrap my head around the following point: the simple truth is that, to most of the people who will buy from me, I’m already the expert. I simply haven’t accepted it. So by that measure, I have NOTHING TO PROVE!

• I’ve found that the trick is to simply start doing something—somewhere, ANYWHERE—to show people I know my stuff and to then keep doing it, to keep showing up, even though at first I know I’m probably going to suck.

• This is the 3rd edition of Shaking the Tree and I know issues #1 and #2 had a few production issues. But rather than fret about it I’m going to course correct as I go and I’m NOT going to let minor errors hold me back.
  
  Six months from now no one will remember these things except me. So, get going and keep—even if and when you doubt yourself and your own abilities.

• I’ve also learned that by avoiding self-deprecating remarks about my skills, knowledge, and accomplishments and by sharing my story and my thoughts with others in my niche, people are more likely to take me seriously.

If you’d told me three months ago that I’d be running a newsletter and that it would be gaining traction I’d have told you you were insane. But here we are. Small steps.

If you’re one of the 82%, welcome to the club and I hope the points above and below help you.

Here are 10 more tips to help you overcome those soul-sapping feelings of dread:

1. Acknowledge and recognize that imposter syndrome is a common experience that many people face. I mean here I am, sharing my struggles.

2. Reframe your negative thoughts and self-doubt as opportunities for growth and learning. This for me has been huge. By looking at things from a different viewpoint, EVERYTHING has shifted.

3. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can offer encouragement and perspective. I’ve found working with a life coach has helped me.

4. Celebrate your successes and achievements, no matter how small they may seem.
   Hey, here I am with my third installment of a new newsletter!

5. Practice self-compassion and be kind to yourself, just as you would be to a friend.

   I’ve spent too much time beating myself up over real and imagined failures instead of seeing them as lessons on how to course correct.

6. Challenge your inner critic by focusing on evidence that supports your abilities and accomplishments. You have covered way more ground than you give yourself credit for.

7. Set realistic goals and expectations for yourself, and break larger goals into smaller, achievable steps. Let’s be honest with ourselves: ROME WASN’T BUILT IN A DAY. Let’s step back, let’s take things in our stride, and let’s be easier on ourselves.

8. Embrace failure as a natural part of the learning process and an opportunity for growth. This has been a tough lesson for me to learn and I’m much less hard on myself these days than I used to be.

9. Develop a growth mindset by viewing challenges as opportunities to learn, rather than as threats to your abilities. Anything that doesn’t rob me of my health or my security is OK.

10. Cultivate positivity … a positive and supportive environment by surrounding yourself with people who encourage and uplift you. Another hard lesson for me to learn as I’ve tended in years past to lean more toward melancholy. I’m getting better.

SUMMING UP … If you’d told me three months ago that I’d be writing about this kind of stuff in an online newsletter I’d have told you you were insane. But here we are. Small steps.

As always, thanks for reading.

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And if you’ve like what you’ve seen here, why not become a subscriber?

P.S. Next time on Shaking the Tree … How a content creation schedule changed the way I write and why you need one too!